I am burning. Can you feel it?

2006-06-10T21:47:00.000+08:00

moved.

Heh.

2006-04-18T21:41:00.000+08:00

There are important things in life than this.

Conversations.

2006-02-11T22:08:00.000+08:00

Here is someone fun to talk to....

Me: whatever
God:Are you saying you don't care about it?
Me: yeah
God:What do you care about?
Me: sex
God:As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Me: right
God:I am glad we agree.
Me: ha ha
God: I am so glad you find this amusing.

Another snippet,

Me: god?
God: GOD rules.
Me: i know
God: How do you know it?
Me: i just know
God: Perhaps it is an expression of your unconscious.
Me: right
God:I am glad we agree.

Go on, talk to god

2006-01-13T22:12:00.000+08:00

Nabeh. Nabeh. Nabeh.

The bed, does it give you the tingles?

2006-01-02T11:41:00.000+08:00

Yesterdae I woke up at 10. den I think why must wake up one. Den mummy and daddy asked me to go wit em. I say dun wan.

Cause I hav to met *insert a random name* mah. Aiyo they scold me wan, y must likee tat? Waahhh. I goin to sleep again. No use one ah. I hattee life and I hattee u.

I was so tempted to blog like that. That is why I decided it is best to let the blog rot.

Anyways, happy New Year…yada yada..

Work is wonderful and extremely entertaining as usual. Everyday has been a busy day, and I think I am falling in love with my manager. Haha.

He has this open door policy unlike other managers who let the supervisors sink or swim. Heh. Everyday I end up talking to him about everything and anything which normally lasts up to an hour. Once I start rattling I don’t stop, one of the reason that I didn’t have the mood to blog is because I empty out everything to him and it is really tiring to string it up in words and post it up in this blog.

I get the warm feeling every time I think about him, no, no it is not the “like like” type, its more out of respect….there are not many people who I look up to and I was surprised to realize that I admire him not for what he is but for what he does… I am starting to look at him like a father figure (no lah, he is not that old but I don’t know what else to think of him.).

Attended a meeting with fellow newly employed staff with the area manager and HR manager, they wanted to know how we feel about working in that organization and wanted feedbacks. I personally think this is a very good move considering that they actually are willing to listen to us, the group of people employed recently are all of young blood which is definitely a good thing for a company which is reeking of old policies and people.

Now I am all busy trying to prepare for the upcoming meeting with the cashiers, where my manager and I have decided upon some strict rules. It would be interesting to see how some of them react. Heh.

Is it always a must to have a title?

2005-12-11T21:26:00.000+08:00

This is Eshan, I wonder how he is now.

I am ashamed to admit that I have been slacking at work, all because my manager is not around, where did all my energy, the enthusiasm and the desire to achieve something run to??? I could have proved that I could do something great when he wasn't around but I just blew it by slacking. Stupid me being professionally stupid.

Gaya will be away for couple of weeks in Pulau Tekong for her BMT (basic military training), boo hoo, which obviously means I won�t have anyone to hang out with. Boo hoo. I brought her out for a movie (Chicken Little, ha ha, wanted to watch Zathura but they didn�t air it when we went there.) and dinner, KFC of course.

Anyway I am gonna miss her!! Oh yeah, I have this lady (insert old) under me and she doesn�t speak English therefore to make her feel involved and all I have been trying hard to speak in mandarin!! Bawahaha. It is hilarious I tell you!!!!!

Jeez, suddenly I feel blocked. I am out. Save water!!!!!

Aggressive.

2005-12-09T23:31:00.000+08:00

I am going to be so aggressive that they won't know what hit them. These people I work with ought to know how hard I can be, seriously they need to shut their holes and stop giving me instructions.

I wouldn't be so pissed off if it was my manager who was giving instructions; he is not in town anyway. It has been a month since I moved to the new office and still I am finding it hard to get through some of them who are under me.

This woman has been giving throwing instructions at me all the time while I am the one who need to tell her what to do!!!!! Argh. She pissed me off so much yesterday that I told her to deal with the work herself and left the office. Damn, she still doesn�t realize that I was pissed!!! Bah.

Everyone else has "Oh she is new let's not listen to her" attitude. Fuck you all.

Once the manager comes back I am going to arrange for a meeting and show who the boss is.

I know that sounds arrogant and snobby, but the issue is, what I tell them to do is simple and abides all the rules. So I don't see any reason to go against me just because they are used to doing things their way and that I am new. If they want it the hard way then they shall get it just like that.

Random

2005-12-07T23:08:00.000+08:00

It has been long since I blogged isn't it?

Where should I start from, my very first official meeting (ultra boring.)? Or my very first experience as a witness in the subordinate court? (Boring too) Or the temptation to go to India for couple of weeks (thanks to my mom's wonderful idea)? Or the piling stress at work? Or that old bitch Sophia irritating the hell out of me? God, she is such a vicious uneducated and underhanded bitch.

Yes, I did learn from her most of the work related stuff, so I try to respect and be nice to her but seriously she bursts me like a balloon. How I wish I could kick her hard. She is fucking dramatic too.

This is so random. Gotta wake up early tomorrow so I am gonna hit the bed.

Chew your food properly peeps!
Peace out.

Then.

2005-11-21T22:42:00.000+08:00

I was tired, and then I was busy.

Now I am plain lazy. So wait till I shoo away the laziness.

Heh! Suddenly I don’t feel like being lazy.

After much abusive conversation with my fellow evil twin Sister Ann the swan, I decided to call Sophia (don’t let her name fool you, she is old enough to be your mother.), to ask her why she had called me (I am not used to people from the office calling me). It turns out that…umm lets call her Lim, was trying to change her shift with mine, phew I was glad that she couldn’t get me!!

7 o clock shifts means more work, whereas 9 means super free to do your own things and I will be working at 9 tomorrow. This obviously means I will have more time for my department and I have couple of ideas in my hand to liven things up. Let’s see how things work out.

Everybody shops at my branch, I mean absolutely everyone it is all over Singapore, and so I didn’t know why I was so surprised to see a famous blogger walking down the aisle pushing a trolley full of groceries. She is human after all, everyone eats nah?

She caught me staring at her couple of times, I couldn’t help it okay!!! I was wondering if it is really her, she is awfully tall and I felt like a Lilliput (or Lilliputian??) near her. Maybe just maybe I will freak her out by shouting her name in front of a shop full of people. Ha ha. Okay, not funny.

Finally Gaya and I watched Harry potter and Goblet of fire!!!!!!!!!! Whoooo. FINALLY.

I went to the movie expecting to be disappointed cause I read in a blog that it kinda sucked, but it did not. The character Harry’s crush Cho Chang was a disappointment though, I think my friend Hui Fen is prettier and to think there would be more of her in the next movie!!!! Bah.

Jeez, just when I want to get something down my mom starts something which I can’t ignore. Bah.

Bye for now then.

Tired

2005-11-07T20:39:00.000+08:00

I am aching all over.

I can't wait to go there again.

:)

2005-11-06T11:52:00.000+08:00

I didn't know.

But now I do.

I am not physic you know?

I am so glad. Just like that.

I didn't let it get to my head. I thought I could always brush it away. Brush you away. I have a sudden urge to get a tattoo. Should I?? Maybe just like the one that you have?

November 28th.

:)

Stunt.

2005-11-01T19:56:00.000+08:00

Today being the Halloween (in the US lah), Bhargav went for his first ever tick or treat!! He told me he went as an invisible man with the stupid mask and whatnots. That lil idiot of mine specifically counted the number of sweets / chocolates (208 to be exact) he got, he is very happy now that he can open his own sweet stall.

The one in the pic is Stephen in his best Halloween stint.

You all know that I want to name my son Arya, since I didn’t know the meaning of it I went ahead and searched it in yahoo.

I was expecting something like energy / vibrant, simply because it sounds like it.

But then fate has its own games……

How can!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to name my SON Arya, and the stupid name ends up as a girl’s name?? No fair!!!! This is totally unexpected and traumatizing!!

Goddess some more!!!!!!!!!!!!! How can!! *wails*

I frantically searched the other webpage’s hoping at least one will differ.

:( nope:(

I really, really like the name Arya. I decided that I would name him just that no matter what and for the rest of my life I will make sure he will never know the meaning of his name (don’t ask me how), lets say eventually he finds out (with the internet and all, sheesh), I will clearly tell him that it is his dad’s brilliant idea. There. It is simple aint it? Then he will love me just the same.

I couldn’t sleep at all, it was around 4 am in the morning I couldn’t lay still in the bed so I decided to browse few more pages and dig deep in to this.

To my relief I saw this

Right then I was the happiest insomniac person in Singapore.

I realized I haven’t wikipediaed and so I did.

Arya (árya-) is a Sanskrit term used by Hindus, Buddhists, Jains and others. It means "master, noble, lord" or can refer to any Vaishya. In Avestan, the cognate word is an n-stem, airyan-.

Again those sentences made me happy.

An Arya is one who hails from a noble family, of gentle behavior and demeanor, good-natured and of righteous conduct.

And again.

Arggh. They are showing xmen. Brb.

*****************

Happy diwali / deepavali ya all!! I wore saree bawaha. Whatever.

Too much?

2005-10-30T22:04:00.000+08:00

I want to have a happy married life and wonderful kids. I want it to be like a family in the soap operas.

"Dad is already home, mom!" says lil Arya in a cheerful voice and lil Harini says "daddy, daddy come and look at my drawing". And I rush to plant a kiss on his cheek and say "lets go out to eat". (ha ha)

I want this kind of warmth in my family.

Is this too much to ask for?

Morons and phone bills.

2005-10-30T21:00:00.000+08:00

I am always trying to be cheerful and charming. I never get too serious with people when they're around, but when I am alone, I think about what they have said. That's because I don't want anyone to see me being too somber.

So shut the fuck up and stop trying to judge. You don't know anything about me or what I think and stop acting like you are my best friend or something. Even my friends of 8 years don't know the half of me.

Ps: I bet you are gay.

**

Other than moronic people annoying me, my phone bill calmed me down. It has been like 5 months since the bill amount are in two digits!! Halleluiah.

38 bucks?? No problemo, I can pay that, its peanuts!! It pained me to pay 596 bucks last month though. sigh.

Confirmed baby!

2005-10-30T11:28:00.000+08:00

Can't believe that it has been 3 months since I started work, now I am confirmed staff!!! Whooo.

Barren.

2005-10-29T11:01:00.000+08:00

Here and there.

2005-10-28T21:10:00.000+08:00

Picasa has gone nuts, so no picture for today!

I was fearing yesterday would turn out real bad, but everything went like a breeze.

*grin*

No work today, la la la laa.

Instead went to the training center to finish up last week’s class. God damn, I couldn’t keep myself awake, never in my life have I felt so sleepy!!

I didn’t want to insult the instructor by dozing away so I left the class pretending to use the wash room, and I didn’t go back till it was the end of the class. Hah.

Finally I had a chance to talk to Desmond, whatever shit I was thinking I poured out to him and he has being very supportive and encouraging.

Now I feel like crap, because I feel exploited. Who asked me to tell him everything that I was thinking?? It is none of his business anyway and the next time I see him, I won’t be so mysterious anymore!!! Boo hoo.

I know you guys won’t understand a thing; I am not in the mood to explain anything so figure out on your own or give me a buzz.

Oh, oh… I have registered for the degree already!!!!! Whooooooooooo

Man, I will work so hard that I am going to surprise myself. For now I am gonna do some work related research. Ta.

I have such low tolerance level.

2005-10-26T23:35:00.000+08:00

Pardon the extensive offensive word use.

Its fucking annoying when they fucking speak in Chinese and I can't fucking understand any fucking word. But I fucking well know that they are talking about me, some more in front of me. What am I, fucking invisible?

I know you don't have to do whatever I tell you, but too bad for you I am your fucking supervisor and you have to fucking do what I tell you to do.

And also shut your hole and fucking listen.

It is not under my job description to listen to you speak in a language that I don�t understand. If I am paid for that too then I would fucking give you any respect.

Breathe in, breathe out.

*Calms down*

God I can't believe people are so cheap, can't they play it decent? It is a work place damn it, you got to give and take.

I was polite and nice but this is what I get?? I even told her I would let her work OT but she went on rambling in Chinese to others and what does she expect me to do?? I went straight to the manager room and asked him to hear whatever she was saying. I am happy to say, I screwed her quiet well.

Ps: Pardon the mess behind.

So.

2005-10-25T22:04:00.000+08:00

Work hard. Yeah lah. Everyone knows that. Working hard won�t bring you anywhere if you don't work smart.

Work smart.

Is that so hard to understand?

Stupid maggots.

This is why no one wants to employ old people.

In the next training class I don�t want to sit with Andrew.

Someone from the old branch (C) called and asked how I was doing and stuff, she is the most annoying person that I have met. She is annoying to the extent that you would want to walk away from her. Okay, first of all I shouldn't be blogging about her, but screw it.

I nearly snapped once.

She is annoyingly nice. Yes, NICE. Bloody hell, if you hear her talk you would know. I have never met a person who is sooooooooo courteous, kind, helpful and caring (add whatever good words you can think of)!! After all she might be faking it, but what puzzles me is, how can she hold up her act so long?

When I first met her I thought she was so weird, now I know she is really weird. She got me a box of Ferreo Rocher (bah, ignore the spelling if it is wrong)!!

Where got such thing one??? She barely knows me and if you total the amount of time we spent talking, it is like 26 minutes and she got me a box of expensive chocolates? Whatever, free chocolates.

Heh!! I think I know why, no one bothered to return her hi, hellos and whatnot. I was the only person who would at the least twitch at her. Okay, okay, I was nice to her can! I was nice enough to ask her how her day was when no one bothered to even look at her. See it pays being nice. Whoo, chocolates.

Shut up and shut it.

2005-10-24T21:52:00.000+08:00

I wish she would just shut up about it, not everyone in the world needs to know my personal shit. I know she is trying to help and all, but she is pushing the limits.

My patience is wearing off and I just want to yell...shut up and shut it.

:(

2005-10-23T12:26:00.000+08:00

I don't want to go to work.

:(

2005-10-23T12:21:00.000+08:00

It is Sunday morning and I am getting ready for work. Half heartedly dragged myself to the toilet to wash up, mom has to go to work too, she as some unfinished projects.

From Thursday onwards I will be working solo at the branch so gotta learn to handle the money issues and how to close the store, you know the alarm activation thingy.

By the way the one in the pic is none other than Habib Nur Hajamohedin (I know I spelt your name wrong, sue me la!!), he was just shielding himself form the cam with his stupid laptop. My laptop is way better than yours.

Frustration.

2005-10-22T22:25:00.000+08:00

It is frustrating, damn it!

Here I am trying to concentrate in the “never ending boss battle” game from neopets, so many thoughts keep flying in and out of my mind. What good is it if I can’t play a game and enjoy it?

It has been bugging me for almost a week; remember I was talking about taking up a degree programme? Well, the university has accepted me and the semester starts coming January.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuttttttttttttttt.

I am having second thoughts about joining mainly because of the commitment of studying (yikes) and also that my family strongly thinks that I should be taking up something technical rather than something very common. When they say technical they mean the engineering side and when they say common it is a business degree.

If I study now I will never be able to save any money for the next two years and if I don't study now I might never study at all. I fear that the enthusiasm in me will die and Suresh coming here in a year or two will totally affect my decision of studying.

The job ain't helping either, yesterday I came home near to 12. I didn�t even bother to change out of the uniform (which is so gross by the way, I look like a student from international school Singapore, ISS which is very near to my branch.).

Compared to the other branch where I spent almost three months there is no manpower here at all, while the branch C has 7 supervisors and almost 100's of people working under them while the branch D (where I am working currently), has only three supervisor's including me and a pathetic number of 20 something people under us.

If you calculate by the space or how big the branch is, the D branch is slightly smaller than that C branch, but the sales is not as good as the C branch that is why the shortage of manpower and so much multitasking.

When the situation is like this, as a supervisor one has to forget about the ego and whatnot and really do everything on their own. That is why the constant whining of tiredness.

If I am going to take up a degree and the sales situation doesn�t improve I have to seriously consider everything all over again. Bah.

Anyway I have sent a letter to NUS asking them if the degree that I want to take will be recognized when I join their MBA program.

One of my collogues from branch C (she is technically still my collogue lah, since we are all under one organization!!) asked me if I wanted to go Vietnam.

Eh I have things like degree and masters in my mind why the heck would I be thinking of Vietnam??? Some more I have been to Vietnam already liao. Yes, Ann I have been there before. Sorry I forgot to mention it earlier. Hee.

Overshadowed.

2005-10-22T21:27:00.000+08:00

Sitting there
With all the confidence
Faking the minutes
Dreading the seconds
The fear is shadowed
No one can hear
Your apprehension
Time stays still
Number of glances
At your watch
Shows your anxiety
No one notices it
You get through it
Like you always do

You ask me how I do it.

Drained.

2005-10-20T22:46:00.000+08:00

Once again I feel empty. Ugh. Let me change that, the right word should be drained. Physically and mentally, there is so much work every day and I keep telling myself that I can get through it and someday it will all be worth it.

It is the fear of responsibility, the job given to me is very crucial and multitasking has never been my cup of tea, I find everything so hard damn it.

Mom says since I am new in this new branch, everything seems much difficult than it is and that it will be all fine once I learn how to handle everything. Bah.

I sure hope so.

BAH!

2005-10-20T22:42:00.000+08:00

Some people are so annoying that you would want to slap them over the phone.

A conversation over the phone with someone I know.
It starts of with the normal hi and hello’s.

She: eh you know which bus goes to Ginza Plaza from here?
Me: from where?
She: from here.
Me: huh? I mean from where??? Where are you right now?
She: oh, cheh be clear lah.

I am like huh?????

She: I am in Clementi.
Me: you can take 282 from interchange or 189.
She: 283?
Me: 282.
She: not 283 ah?
Me: no 282.
She: last time I took 283 leh.
Me: there is no bus other than 282 or 189.
She: hah, really ah?

This is when I really wanted to slap her real hard. If she can’t bring herself to believe what others have to say, why bother asking? Grr.

Too tired to blog.

2005-10-17T21:22:00.000+08:00

Passed the stupid test.

The manager stood behind me for like 2 fucking hours, I thought it would never end. I was doing fine till the part where I had to do some declaration on the pc and I screwed it up real bad. The manager being a kind soul helped me out and passed me after asking so many freaking theory questions.

Then everyone was sweet enough to hug and say goodbye! Oh, I am gonna miss them so much. When I was posted there I thought that was the worst thing that could ever happen to me but the people proved it wrong.

Sandy and Jean got me presents from Thailand; funny thing is they didn�t get anything for the others whom they have known for the past 5 years. Shrug�

I didn't share with anyone that today was my last day; I just didn�t want to make it a big issue. Can�t they figure it out when they don't see me at my desk anymore?

My breakfast buddies said they wanted to treat me but I didn't have the heart or stomach. All I could think was about the new branch and what awaits me there. So without stopping for breakfast I caught a taxi and rushed there, just to find the new manager pushing a trolley full of goods!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE NEW MANAGER PUSHING A TROLLEY FULL OF GOODS????

Well that was the first for me, hats off to that guy. I found out later that he always helps out the retail assistants to stack up goods and sometimes even cleans up the floor when the cleaner is not around. I was like woah.

I lost the mood to blog.

Ciao.

Go with the flow

2005-10-16T09:57:00.000+08:00

Two big aspects for any retail business to excel are the image and the service they provide. The latter is always difficult to build; therefore keeping that in mind I have started a project on customer service.

Being in a retail industry and the front line any fool would know that customer service is the key to hit it off the road. So I am coming up with a project (it is something like a presentation, especially for the front line staff), which I want submit to the company’s training center where they employ their own staff to teach. (The company is certified as people developer)

Anyway there are too many things happening and at a speed that I can’t control.

A week ago before the manager left to United States for some kind of seminar, he told me that the HR / HQ (who cares?) has come up with a new policy of testing the new employees to make sure that they know what they are doing. Since I am one of the new employees I would have to complete this 2 hours of test and then if I pass he would give me that confirmation letter.

*rolls eyes*

Pardon me, it is a great idea and all but there is no consistency through out the programme they have laid out. See, no one follows the schedule that the HQ has planned out for the employee, okay lets take an example of the cashiering machine also called the point of sales machine, if one follows the instructions by HQ he or she should be attached to one of the “experienced” cashier for a week and left alone for another week to serve the customers. But nothing like that happens because the person in charge just doesn’t bother and covers it up when asked questions.

Yeah sure they let them train with a cashier for like couple of days and nobody else cares after that. This is the problem with a big organization; no one digs deep enough to know what is really going on. There is absolutely no one to check or imply the rules and regulations, everything is somewhat covered up by someone before it reaches the HQ. I swear even the manager tries to cover his own ass instead of speaking up or taking any action.

Bah.

The test aside, I will be starting work in a new branch from Monday, that too after I finish that stupid test. I just feel tired of everything. I can’t control anything, except the degree programme that I will be registering on Monday.

In high school all I wanted to do was get that O level cert, then the diploma cert, now a degree…and soon it will be masters!

Arya!

2005-10-14T21:52:00.000+08:00

Arya, Arya, Arya. I am going to name my son Arya.

Tomorrow

2005-10-10T23:42:00.000+08:00

As usual I forgot to bring my wallet to work, and as usual my breakfast buddies wanted to treat me and as usual I refused politely and came home for brunch.

That was the only eventful thing that happened the whole day, other than K really pissing the hell out me, leaving me alone at the office to deal with all the shit that he had to do (but S came to my rescue cause some kind soul called him up and told him to get his ass to the office) and me forgetting to dispatch some important documents.

So yeah.

Looking forward to tomorrow.

I am right this time.

2005-10-09T22:39:00.000+08:00

I am right!

Like I said that they would fail, they did but it kinda bugs me cause I wanted them to fail.

Come on, I can’t be blamed, and it was morally worng!!

Now they are literally in the streets. No place to live and no one to turn to. Scarred everyone around them.

Cheating is never good really, never.

I kinda pissed them off cause I kept using that “I told you so” tone and kept telling them to undo what ever they did. I know whoever is reading this won’t understand the situation. As it is really sensitive I don’t want to mention it and get into any kind of shit.

It really helps to think before you do something. And next time I am praying that they would do some thinking.

I just changed my shift to morning shift!! Bah. This means I gotta wake up early but it is still good anyway because I can come home real early in the noon.

This is just to work with A, she makes my life easier and I never run out of breakfast buddies in the morning! whoo.
;

Things

2005-10-08T22:15:00.000+08:00

Have you ever wanted to do so many things but couldn’t bring yourself to start anything??

See I have so many things that I want to do, and I know I can do it but there is always the hesitancy stopping me from doing anything nice for myself or the people around me. I have so many things lined up in my mind but nothing gets a head start.

The things that I am talking about are not things that are extremely difficult to do but simple things like burning CDs or even reading Shakespeare’s Anthony and Cleopatra. I know, I know, some of the things are not even important but when something crosses my mind, I just push it far away let it be important or not and in couple of weeks it just disappears and I start thinking about new things which I never do anyway.

Professionally I want to excel and climb up the corporate ladder that everyone is talking about. To get a head start one should be hardworking, organized, and extremely dependable right? I am none of that!!

I certainly am not hardworking, if I were, instead of blogging I would be reading the work instructions that I brought from the office. If I were organized, my desk in the office wouldn’t look like hurricane Katrina hit it, and I am so not dependable, when a guy from the police force asked me where he can get a particular information, all I did was blink hard and rushed to call the other supervisor (well, for this I still have the excuse of being new in the office).

Anyway my point is when I can’t even get myself to do simple things how can I push myself to climb up any ladder?

Fail please.

2005-10-06T19:38:00.000+08:00

Woah. I just figured out something. *pats herself on the back*, wah, so clever.

Was I shocked? Of course I was. I still am.

It is going to scar them and the people around them for life, because what they are going to do is plain stupid and highly irresponsible and selfish and stupid and really stupid and really, really, really, really stupid. Throwing away life just like that for something so….what’s the word I am looking for…oh yeah…..unstable.

I may be wrong but I know I am not.

I can’t wait to see them fail…

Oh shut it.

I am evil like that.

Do I feel sorry for them?

Umm…

Uggh…

Should I? Well, it is not like I never warned them against it…so yeah, they can rot.

I got it Red.

2005-10-05T20:09:00.000+08:00

If this doesn't make me stronger, I don't know what will.

Waiting for a green signal.

2005-10-04T22:36:00.000+08:00

Hi ******* I am esh* calling form **************, I was informed by my manager Mr. *** that I would be transferred to ****** to work as a chief *******.

I thought about it well and through, I am very, very hesitant to take it up. As I see no future prospects in chief ********, even though it is a responsible position, it will not provide me a challenging environment. I am very much interested in retail background, and I was planning to apply for part time bachelor’s degree in local institutes.

To reach ******* branch I have to take two buses….the reason I am stating this is not because I am lazy to travel and whatnot, but because I would not be able to save money and time which I can invest in my future studies.

I am not insisting that I want to stay in ************, you can always transfer me to other branches like ******* or *********. I hope you would consider this request. Thanks!

Waiting for a green signal.

Change

2005-09-28T17:15:00.000+08:00

Is change good for everyone? No, certainly not, but everyone else thinks that it would be good for me.

I tell myself, Oh well, just go with the flow. I have come too far to turn back and leave.

Harry potter’s goblet of fire will be out soon, I just saw some of the pics form the movie!!! I can’t wait to watch it in big screen!

stupid and angry

2005-09-26T23:59:00.000+08:00

Stupid people = stupid customers

Stupid customers and stupid cashiers = angry supervisor

Angry supervisor = me.

Okay!

2005-09-26T00:22:00.000+08:00

It was okay. Everything is okay. I don’t know if I am comfortable with being okay.

Okay?

The guys in the office practically forced me to place bet on a silly game, nope not with money instead they came up with a brilliant idea of making me eat moon cakes. They know I am not a big fan of it, and they specially chose the one with the egg yolk. Yuckiness.

They couldn’t get me to agree to it, so they had to settle with eating 20 lakerol sweet at one shot, you know how sticky they can get nah? So if I lost the game I would end up with the sweets in my mouth and if they won they would stuff 20 sweets, the moon cakes and eat rotten Longan. *rolls eyes* just one that is.

That being the most thrilling thing I would ever convince someone to do for a bet, tried my best to win. Of course I won and the guys totally bailed on eating the lakerol sweets!!!! Hmmp. And the Longan!!!!! Hmmp. Well, they ate the moon cake at least. I didn’t really bother about whether they ate or not, I was satisfied with the bonding and all. It does help that they are not superficial.

Yes it is a Sunday, and I was at work. I am on the retail side okay! I can’t help it!! weekend means free time, free time means bored people, bored people means more customers, more customers means more money, more money means more profit, more profit means a lot of things some include the promotion, more money, more money and more money! See it all works out.

Aunty?? What aunty?

2005-09-24T22:46:00.000+08:00

Bloody ignorant people.

I am fuming all right. One idiotic ignorant son of a ***** called me aunty, I would have forgiven him if he were a 5 year old, I would have totally forgotten it if he hadn’t called me that in front of my parents, or it would all be so much better if I actually looked like an aunt!!!!!!

Hmmp.

Ass.

I am 21 for fucks sake and I certainly don’t look auntiesh.

Why can’t strangers call other strangers sir, mister, miss or madam? I always do, I never ever call anyone I don’t know aunty or uncle.
I say calling anyone who is not related to you aunty/uncle/ brother/sister is insulting. The latter two is way better though.

Damn that guy.

Ass.

I wouldn’t have minded if he had rudely shouted “excuse me” or “oi”!!! I wish I can let him know the emotional trauma that he got me into.

Ass.

Other than stupid ignorant people calling me aunty, I have been doing quiet bad at work actually.

One of the senior collogue sat me down and talked to me for almost 20 minutes. Should I freak out?? Hell yeah I should.

I am burning. Can you feel it?

Winners and Grinners

2005-09-19T18:50:00.000+08:00

Not missing anything.

2005-09-18T20:46:00.000+08:00

I don’t miss going to school. I don’t know if I like working. I wouldn’t say I hate it; I just can’t make up my mind. I am just going to the office for the sake of doing something + to clear the stupid bond that I got myself into.

The thing is, I am not afraid to work hard, the harder it is the better it will be. But going there everyday, just waiting for someone to tell me what to do is sickening, the one I am assigned to is a very nice person with a very short temper. She is the one who should be giving me work and when the others see that she is not doing what she should be doing, they start telling me what to do. Well, I don’t mind that…all I can think is “ah, at least I have something to do.”

Loved it!

2005-08-11T20:18:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday gaya!!!

I loved working today, was so busy that I couldn�t move from the desk for almost 5 hours! It is amazing to meet new people (customers), well, some are pain in the ass but a polite smile automatically works in most people. Signed almost 300 authorization papers and my fingers hurt like bitch.

Gaya, has called us over to her house for a small party thingy, so I am off to meet Ringkey to get some wine and then get the present that Gaya would never expect. Hah.

Peace.

2005-08-10T20:51:00.000+08:00

Wahhhh!!! There is peace at home! Finally!!! I thought that bloody opera / karaoke thingy would be on today but nope, no sign or sound of it!! yay!

Ever since I started working, all I have been feeling is sleepy, tired, sleepy, tired and really sleepy and really tired. This sucks, I can't make myself think straight and I am constantly thinking about what to do at work tomorrow.

Training sessions do help, I was at the training center today and it felt great but of course together with the sleepiness and the tiredness. So I am done with the retail merchandising class, one step ahead. The test was not that bad, as I mentioned in the last post it was an open book test but it only helped in the practical test as for the theory one I had to scrap it on my own, anyways I scored 46 upon 50! Whoo. The lowest is 45 and the highest is 49, talk about stress.

The stupid me is still struggling with the stupid reports. Going off to meet Ringkey, for dinner. Ciao.

Letters of love...

2005-08-10T20:32:00.000+08:00

Kiasu

2005-08-09T21:52:00.000+08:00

I called Ringkey to let her know that I was hungry, sleepy and annoyed. Okay, not exactly annoyed but was feeling restless, there is this stupid concert of some kind is going on behind my apartment and they are fucking noisy. Since this month is the hungry ghost month (the 7th month thingy), they have some kind of celebration, every single year they put up a huge ass tent in the car park and they have auctions, karaoke singing, crappy opera and loads of on stage bull shitting.

This continues for 3 to 4 days, they start around 6 in the evening and won’t stop till 11 or 12. grrr. I can’t concentrate on my work and watching tv in the noise is extremely annoying. So yeah. I am done with the venting, going off to get some studying done for tomorrow’s training test, even though it is an open book test, I am opting to be kiasu.

Looking ahead for a better day.

2005-08-09T21:09:00.000+08:00

Work is sorta, kinda, TOTALLY KILLING me!! Waking up at 6 is crazy, going to work is crazy, facing those ignorant annoying people is crazy, everything is crazy and bleah.

Come to think of it, all these are way better than dealing with the guy who is lazy, complains that all the work is pushed to him and simply ignores me and everyone around him. God, he is such an ass. The manager attached me to his department and he is supposed to teach me everything that a person in his position should do. The thing is he does NOTHING. Absolutely nothing, compared to the others around him, he does NOTHING. So there is no point in me expecting him to teach me anything that he does. Pfft.

No use blabbering, anyway I will be transferred to another department tomorrow and I wouldn’t have to deal with him again (hopefully).

Santosh

2005-08-07T11:51:00.000+08:00

santosh, means happiness

Someday...

2005-08-04T20:12:00.000+08:00

Attending training classes with soon to be managers can be really intimidating, after all I am only a supervisor, and I will have to work under them someday.

Devdas, drinking and driving.

2005-08-02T22:32:00.000+08:00

Yeah. Don’t drink and drive.

Saw this board somewhere near Spencer’s plaza, Madras or Chennai however you want to call it. When I saw it I thought it was an ad for the movie Devdas but it was from Chennai’s traffic police!

I was there with Suresh…stop, stop, stop….I don’t want to think about it anymore. Miss him so bloody much!

Really worried about tomorrow, I am posted to another department for a week and have to deal with one of the experienced supervisor, just crossing my fingers that he would be nice and really nice.

I am sleepy again. I wish I was drunk. The report is due and it really needs to be done, hope I can work on it tomorrow. I seriously need time management lessons, my mom and Suresh.

Tiredness.

2005-08-01T20:40:00.000+08:00

I couldn't think straight, wanted to throw my head back and scream, all I could hear from the trainer was some kind of buzzzz and blah, blah, blah, and lots of other blah's, yawned 1020138192384 times and each time I covered my mouth and hid behind the pc, dragged myself to the toilet and splashed water in my face, it didn't help a bit and nearly fell asleep thrice.

And now I want to ~~die~~ sleep.

To heck with the reports that I have to submit to my manager.

Empty

2005-07-31T22:00:00.000+08:00

Sunday night, sitting here all alone in an empty house, with empty thoughts and an empty glass. It is haunting.

Won't be in the office tomorrow, should I be relieved or start worrying about the training session which I have to attend??

I have decided to worry.

My lil cous.

2005-07-31T18:41:00.000+08:00

Starting it off with my fav person in the world!!! This is my Bhargi doggie!!! Ahah…missing him so much, couple of days earlier he was here (in SG). I don’t normally try to please anyone or sacrifice my evening so easily, but I did just that for my idiot and my aunt. Went to the airport, ALL ALONE (those who know me personally know very well that I don’t like going anywhere alone) to meet them, they were stopping over SG for a day to settle bank issues and then flied to USA.

The minute he arrived he was like since you are working, can you buy me something?? Ahaha I knew what he wanted!!!!!! So I brought him there and got him something he had been longing for, for almost six months!

Can’t figure what he wanted? It was a burger!!!!! Ahah.

Yeah, he was in India for a while and he totally missed eating burgers, when I was there a month ago he was practically begging me to get him a burger!! Unfortunately my town did not have any burgers or anything, heck most of them don’t even know what a burger is.

So yeah. I didn’t just stop with the burger, I bought him black forest, a pie, popcorn chicken and cookies, yes, yes all in one day. Had a great time with him and I am missing him so much!!!!